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The dog days

I've heard this is true for many chronic illnesses and I've seen it to be true for myself: there are good days, there are okay days, and there are bad days. 

 When people ask me how I'm doing I usually respond with "I'm alright," or "I'm okay today." But when I have the bad days, the dog days, the rough days, it's hard to lie. This is when I usually say something vague like "Oh you know, there are good days and bad days." 

 Unfortunately, I can't control when those days come. If I could plan them, I would choose days when I have no plans and it's raining, or days when I can just lay in bed. I wouldn't pick the days when I have family visiting, or I want to go out and see friends, or when I have plans to actually have a life. 

 Today was a dog day. Today was a 4 faints in 4 hours day. Today was a vertigo day. Today was a nauseous day. Today was a leg spasm day. Today was a brain fog day. 

 But today was also Father's Day. Today was the first time I got to see my uncle and cousins in months. Today was a day I've been looking forward to because we had family over for dinner and we were having fried chicken. I was looking forward to playing corn hole with my sisters and dad. 

 But instead, Mandy and Ally had to escort me everywhere because I fainted every time I stood. I spent more time laying on the floor or sitting with my head between my knees trying to get the room to stop spinning than visiting my family. I had to explain to my 5 year old cousin what the machine attached to my stomach and chest (my Holter monitor) was. And by the end of the day mom and I were shopping for wheelchairs. 

 After another day of very limited independent mobility and after my episode in CVS yesterday, we've decided that we ought to invest in a wheelchair. I've been experiencing a lot of anxiety about going out in public since I've fainted in stores several times now. I've also had several minor injuries from fainting at home and I'm relying heavily on my sisters to do simply things like go to the bathroom. 

 If you know of any affordable places to rent or buy wheelchairs, let me know! We are going to browse at Costco and Sam's before possible purchasing one on Amazon but I'm new to this market so please help me out in anyway you can! (I'm looking at you, fellow lymies) 
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